So...little G, if you are in there I'm sorry I've been so obsessed with having a girl. If you are a boy, I will love you just the same. Passionately and unwaveringly.
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Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Feeling Guilty
I've been admittingly obsessed with the gender of this baby. But...what if it's a boy? What if I'm carrying on about having a girl and there is a little boy in there trying to develop going "Hello! I'm a boy get over it and shut up already!"
Skeeved Out
There was a picture of him on the post card and he looked like any normal guy. That, I guess is the scary part. She said she'd seen him several times and she would have never guessed by looking at him.
So last night C and I took the boys to dinner. We went to a restaurant, a buffet that I've been to a million times over the past 7 or so years. It turned out to be kids eat free night which was pretty good news. We ate and stayed about an hour/hour and a half. I did notice a guy that worked there, he was very friendly and smiley and nodded each time I passed him, boy in tow. I didn't feel any particular feeling when I passed him even though for some reason, unlike some strangers I did notice him and he stuck in my consciousness. Maybe because I've been there so much and never seen him before.
Today I talked to my friend and mentioned how crappy I felt after eating gross buffet food last night. She said 'oh! that's where the sex-offender guy works.' I froze, knowing immediately which one he was. The guy. The smiley one. The sex offender working on kids eat free night.
I flashed back to a moment last night when LeeLee squeezed food between his hands. I got annoyed and ordered him to go wash his hands. "Alone?" he whined. Yes! I said. He seemed so pitiful that I grabbed his hand and took him to wash his hands in the ladies' room. I always go with the boys to the restroom. I'm not overly paranoid usually but the idea of the wrong person being in a restroom with my boys has always made me uncomfortable. But I almost sent him in alone this time. The idea chills me to my core.
I guess sometimes people aren't what they seem. I'd like to believe in rehabilitation, turning over a new leaf. But not for this. Not when children have been hurt. Not when I have two boys of my own.
We had vowed never to eat buffets again after waddling home but now we are definitely not going back.
My Babies
My boys are growing up so fast. They just seem so big to me now. They have always been my babies but now it's not hard to see that they are little boys. Lately they've been talking a lot about 'when they grow up.' Moomers was planning a party that he's going to have when 'he's a grown up.' It was sweet and heartbreaking at the same time.
I love those little guys so much and am so proud of them. It's going to be very apparent when there is a REAL baby in our house how much they have grown these past 5+ years!
Boys at 2 weeks old:
Boys at 2 years old:
Boys 2 weeks ago:
Monday, March 28, 2011
Craving of the Moment:
Too bad this particular slice is from a restaurant in Waco! Otherwise I'd be there first thing tomorrow!!
It's a Boy?
The Chinese Gender Chart said I'm having a boy?!
| Month of Conception | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30 | 31 | 32 | 33 | 34 | 35 | 36 | 37 | 38 | 39 | 40 | 41 | 42 | 43 | 44 | 45 |
| January | G | B | G | B | G | B | B | G | B | G | B | G | B | B | B | G | B | B | G | B | G | B | G | B | G | B | B | G |
| February | B | G | B | G | B | B | G | B | G | B | G | B | G | G | G | B | G | B | B | G | B | G | B | G | B | G | B | B |
| March | G | B | G | G | B | G | B | B | B | G | B | G | G | B | B | B | B | G | B | B | G | B | G | B | G | B | G | B |
| April | B | G | B | G | G | B | B | G | G | B | G | G | G | G | G | B | G | B | G | B | B | B | B | G | B | G | B | G |
| May | B | G | B | G | B | B | G | G | G | G | G | B | G | G | G | G | G | G | B | G | B | B | G | B | G | B | B | G |
| June | B | B | B | G | G | G | B | B | B | G | G | B | G | G | G | G | G | G | G | B | G | G | B | G | B | G | B | G |
| July | B | B | B | G | G | B | B | G | G | B | B | B | G | G | G | G | G | G | G | G | B | G | B | B | G | B | G | B |
| August | B | B | B | G | B | G | G | B | B | B | B | B | G | G | G | B | G | B | G | B | G | B | G | B | B | G | B | G |
| September | B | B | B | G | G | B | G | B | G | B | B | B | G | G | G | G | G | G | B | G | B | G | B | G | B | B | G | B |
| October | B | B | G | G | G | B | G | B | G | B | B | G | G | G | G | G | G | G | B | B | G | B | G | B | G | B | B | G |
| November | B | G | B | G | G | B | G | B | G | G | G | G | B | G | G | G | B | B | B | G | B | G | B | G | B | B | G | B |
| December | B | G | B | G | G | G | G | B | G | B | G | G | B | B | B | B | B | B | B | B | G | G | G | B | G | B | G | B |
Dreams and Inward Journeys
I've always been really into dreams. This pregnancy, though has been a fairly dreamless one. I sleep pretty heavily each night and groan with pleasure when my aching back hits the mattress. Holding my eyes open past 9:30 PM takes major effort, but once I wake up I just can't remember my dreams.
Last night though...or rather, this morning after I went back to sleep once I got the boys off to school I fell right back asleep and immediately began a series of intense dreams.
In the first one I was really happy: I was going to a department store (?) to find out for certain what gender my baby was. I waited in line and received a typed report that said (AND it came with a guarantee!) that I was having a girl. In my sleep I remember feeling relieved and also a bit smug: I KNEW I was having a girl!
My next dream wasn't so awesome: I was in San Francisco in the Mission and my car got stolen. Boo. I woke up feeling anxious and upset. BUT the important part was the first dream. When I was pregnant with the boys I had lots of dreams that they were boys: none at all that they were girls so there could be something to it.
I don't think the next appointment is for gender: I think it is another *&$$% blood test and a belly checkup. I don't remember if 16 weeks is too early to schedule or not...
Obsessed!
I don't remember being this gender-obsessed during my last pregnancy.Maybe because it was my first and I was too overwhelmed to obsess. Or maybe since the boys were my first, gender wasn't as big of a deal.
Regardless, I have tried every gender test I can find. Some say boy (peeing on a tsp. of baking soda. Yes, really) but some, like this quiz I just took say girl. I just really feel like it's a girl in there! We'll know soon enough!
*photo from: www.playle.com
Growing....
I have had three visits to my doctor so far this pregnancy. I'm not quite 13 weeks so that's a lot. I had so many because my last pregnancy ended in a miscarriage last September at 9 weeks.
So far this little one is doing great. I had two ultrasounds at 6 and 8 weeks so I was pretty sure there would not be one at 12 weeks and there wasn't but I did hear the heartbeat: 140 beats per minute. I was a bit sad to not get to see the little muffin looking more baby-like (at 8 weeks they just look kind of like a fuzzy gummy bear) but...that's ok.
Here is pretty much what the last one looked like:
And now the baby looks more like this:
Pretty crazy growth spurt! Can't wait to see what happens at 16 weeks!
Sunday, March 27, 2011
Hello!
So here is a fresh start and I am happy about it.
First things: I am pregnant! Due in October and hoping for a girl. (even though all of the random old wives' tales I've encountered keep saying boy)
Also: My Moomers lost his tooth today!
Here is his pillow all ready for the Tooth Fairy!
I didn't realize being a fairy for a few minutes would be so stressful! I guess I'm used to the Santa thing when I just leave stuff downstairs. Sneaking into their room was a whole other ball game. I thought I heard stirring, panicked and grabbed the pillow and got out of there! In the hallway I jammed three brand-new dollar bills smeared with glitter and some star confetti into the pocket and left it outside their door.
I figure I can always sneak it back onto his bed before I wake them up in the morning for school.
It was the sweetest thing: after it happened he kept saying "This is my lucky day! This is my special day!" Which brings me to how it happened: this tooth (the one to the left of his front tooth) has been wiggly for quite a while. Then it got REALLY wiggly. I wondered when/how it would fall out and hoped he wouldn't swallow it.
This evening he was wrestling with LeeLee and he came in making a face. I knew right away what had happened. I looked inside and...his tooth was BACKWARDS and kind of jammed up into his gums. I felt a bit faint and reached towards it with a dish towel before losing my nerve and handing the towel to C.
He gulped and grabbed the tooth and tried to turn it around. It came out and that was that. Moomers was SO happy. He didn't care that it was bleeding a bit. He was just thrilled that he had finally lost his tooth...and before his "big" (by 3 minutes ;) brother. Watching him made me tear up. My big boy.
Tonight when I went to exchange his gross tooth for a few brand new glitter-smeared dollar bills (with some star confetti thrown in for good measure) I panicked when I thought I heard them stir. I grabbed the pillow and ran out, putting the money in once I was in the hallway. I figure I can smuggle it back in when I go to wake them for school.
It's not easy being a tooth fairy Mom!! Good night! I hope you all find fairy dust under your pillows tomorrow!! :)
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